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All posts for the month January, 2012

Jealousy: God’s Love Changes Everything

Published January 30, 2012 by theprioritymale

By Amber Verble

The definition of jealousy: jealousy typically refers to the negative thoughts and feelings of insecurity, fear and anxiety over an anticipated loss of something a person values.

I definitely didn’t feel valued when my husband would act jealous. A smile, a laugh, the smallest thing seemed to set him off. Of course, in my mind, it always seemed like such an overreaction and completely unfounded. Why was he jealous?

I would see other couples and wondered if their happiness shadowed this same issue. I would talk to my friends about jealousy in general to try and figure out if they dealt with it and how they handled it. I even got to the point of calling my mom, knowing her advice would be biased, and probably of no real help. I definitely knew I needed to pray about it and I would, somewhat half-heartedly, still trying to find answers on my own. I tried everything, or so I thought, to fix the problem. If I could just be nicer to him, show him more attention and everyone else less. Nothing worked. I ended up feeling overwhelmed and cheated of even the most innocent relationships. As hard as I tried, it was constant hard work, and I could never keep it up. Inevitably I always messed up, let my guard down and here went the cycle all over again. I was so incredibly miserable, the situation so hopeless, that I just gave up. My marriage was nothing like what I had hoped it would be. I even felt like I had lost my best friend at times.

As I got involved in the women’s Bible study at church I started noticing more and more time would go by between our fights. The more I thought about it the more I realized it was directly related to my relationship with Christ. It was so freeing to know it was nothing I had done. The more I had tried, the more I had failed. But I realized that as I spent more time in my Bible, more time getting to know God and His love and grace, the more love I poured into my relationship with my husband. The more I tried to love and understand God, the more I loved and understood my husband. The more patience I practiced with God, the more patience I was giving my husband. The more I tried to understand and accept God’s grace the easier it was to be forgiving with my husband.

When I finally turned to God, He did more than I had even asked for. I think back to advice from a dear friend I wish I had listened to sooner…..the advice to see my husband through God’s eyes. I finally understand what this means….and because I try, I love my husband more passionately than I ever have. My love alone wasn’t enough. God’s love changed everything.

Date Night!

Published January 28, 2012 by theprioritymale

By Jenna Raulerson

Recently as I was catching up on some of my favorite blog reads, I stumbled on a link to a blog called www.adventure-some.com. The writers there have put together a free E-book with twenty Ready-to-go Dates (link to http://dates.adventure-some.com/) that you can download and print, if you wish. I’m always looking for creative date ideas, so I took full advantage of this super easy and FREE opportunity.

When it comes to date night, my husband and I always have several interesting dilemmas. Most of them have been brought to light more since we’ve been married, which has only been for about a year. My idea of date nights always seems to be a little more laid back. For example, I would be perfectly happy taking a nice walk or eating at a cheesy hole-in-the-wall restaurant where our bill totaled $14. My sweet husband on the other hand is the exact opposite. For date night, he likes to get dressed up nice and head out to a fancy schmancy restaurant, order appetizers and a full huge dinner complete with leftovers.

Now, I’m not complaining! My man has great taste, and I’m quite blessed, but this type of dating is not easy on the wallet! That poses another dilemma.

Another problem that pops up on date night for two people with two different types of “dating taste” is the unfortunate grouchiness factor. This happened to us this past Saturday night. Owen works on weekends, so by Saturday night he is dead—-tired, but we don’t have much of an option as far as nights to choose from.

Our original plan was to use a Groupon I had bought for a new French fry only restaurant (this was already pushing it for Owen.) It was out-of-the-box, it was kitchy and it was pretty cheesy (literally). He was being a trooper though. When we got there, it was basically a roadside stand! We were STARVING, and the moods were quickly emerging. In an effort to salvage the night, I quickly let him pick a new restaurant for us to go to.

All-in-all it didn’t end up being the greatest date night ever, but I did learn several lessons.

  1. Planned (and well researched) date nights are the best!
  2. Don’t let one small glitch in the evening ruin your night.
  3. If you know it’s been a long day for you both, plan a date night that’s low-key!
  4. You can be ANYWHERE and be on a date!
  5. Find the humor in the French Fry Stand on the corner.

The “Ready-to-go Dates” E-book offers a great variety of dates for laid back and more upscale evenings, like camping-in, progressive dinner at your favorite restaurants, picnic in the park and mini golf. For our next few date nights, I will be turning to my handy print out for ideas on how to mix it up a bit!

What Are You Doing With Your Breath?

Published January 25, 2012 by theprioritymale

What Are You Doing With Your Breath?

By Kristin Staley

If your life is anything like mine, you probably don’t even have time to read this article. I have so many responsibilities and chores and expectations that I miss out on the little blessings along the way. My little girl is growing up too fast, my birthdays are coming more quickly, and I’ve picked up a few (okay, more than a few) extra pounds. How did I get here? I don’t remember eating that extra slice of pumpkin pie last Thanksgiving. I do, however, recall very vividly running that mile this past October. It’s funny how life gets so busy, and at the end of the week, we feel like we accomplished nothing more than we did last week. God tells us in His Word in Psalm 39:5 that our life is just a breath of air. God only gives us a short amount of time to make an impact on this earth.

I recently had a situation in my life that reminded me what my priorities should be. I spent my days ministering to my students, and I spent my evenings taking care of my daughter, but I wasn’t leaving time for one of the most precious gifts God has given me ­­– my husband. Anyone can be just as effective as I am at my job. Anyone can take my place on the praise team. But only I can be a wife to my husband. My family should be my number one priority every day.

Ephesians 5:22 says, “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.” Submit can be a scary word when your husband wants to watch the game instead of “The Bachelorette” season premiere, but it doesn’t just mean obey your husband. It carries the connotation that we should just simply put his needs above our own. We don’t have to give up our jobs or wants, but if they come before our husbands, our relationship will be hindered. I want to please my Lord, which makes me want to please my husband. Ladies, so much is expected of us, but our Lord commands us to submit to our husbands. Take time every day to show your husband how special he is to you. Ask the Lord to show you how you can make the most of the breath you were given.

 

 

The Dating Diva Experiment

Published January 24, 2012 by theprioritymale

The Dating Diva Experiment

By Chelsea Carr

Girly. Cutesy. Diva. These are not terms that I would typically use to describe myself. I grew up a tomboy, and even to this day, there are many days that I leave the house without a brush touching my unkempt locks. So when the ladies at work sent around this link http://www.thedatingdivas.com/tara/the-spouse-christmas-countdown/ , I was overwhelmed by the level of arts and crafts that would be involved in its execution, but I continued reading – and I am glad that I did.

See, my husband is great at surprises. He is notorious for making life events extra special. He gives great gifts, and I…well… am loyal and consistent. These are great qualities, but they don’t sound that exciting, right? The last thing I needed for the holidays season was another thing to heighten the holiday insanity, but I felt the weight of conviction and committed to the task.

The task: I was to make a card for each day of December counting down until Christmas.  Each card would include either a compliment, a service, or a fun activity.

Like I said earlier, none of the elements of this countdown really played into my strengths, but it really stretched me as a wife to get creative and to take action to put my husband’s needs or wants above my own.  And let me tell you, that man was surprised!  His mom told me later that he told her, “This is so NOT like Chelsea – and I’m loving it!” I am choosing to take that as a compliment. 😉

The result: This experience pushed me to be creative and put my husband first. I had to think, “What will make him happy?” or ,”What can I say or  to make sure he knows that I love and support him?”

After Lawson read the card of the day, they were put on display in the dining room, and towards the end, my husband came home and was overwhelmed by the fact that I had gone to the lengths that I had to make him feel special. As a result, I saw God use this “silly” holiday countdown to encourage my husband to strive to be the best husband and spiritual leader that he can be. My husband was changed by this experience, and now we are reading Wild at Heart by John Eldredge to explore further about who God has made him to be.

My encouragement to you: Don’t let yourself become complacent in your relationship with your husband. Finding new ways to encourage, surprise, and serve your husband has a strong impact on him, but also changes you.

Welcome!

Published January 3, 2012 by theprioritymale

Welcome!

Thank you for checking out our blog! We are a group of ladies who want to grow as wives so we decided to create a blog to help and encourage each other and anyone else who wants to join in on the fun to be the best wife they can be!

We just love our husbands! And we want to enjoy the gift of marriage the way God intended!

Our lives are busy, busy, busy, but we want to make our husbands a priority in our lives and let them know how much they mean to us. When we put our husbands as a priority in our lives, our marriages will grow and our whole family will benefit. In a negative world where divorce is rampant and too easily accepted we want to work at growing our marriage to be a satisfying and fulfilling part of our lives. Life is hard! And so is marriage at times-that is why we have this blog, to help you in your marriage and to ENJOY it!

Feel free to browse around the tabs at top and use the search bar to find anything specific you are looking for. We are always looking for fresh ideas too so feel free to give us some! We love to read and you can see our book reviews if you are looking for a great tool to help your marriage- or recommend one of your own that you think we should read.

We will update this blog weekly so keep coming back for new ideas and new ways to keep your male your priority!

Thanks for being a woman who wants a great marriage!

“A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown” Proverbs 12:4